sole searching

i cant stop walking
away from something blindly into nothing.
i wake up every morning from a sleepless night cursing the alarm that peeled my eyes apart
i cant brush this sour taste out
i cant wash these stains off
ill walk 5 miles out of my way, just hoping that someone would see me
prove that i exist
a shower and a shave
a wink and a smile
its the wool i sew onto their eyelids
if you only knew

writing letters to no one

And hoping for a response.

the kkk took my baby away

This month has been a cold one.

youth: a brief and violent past

im tired and im crashing all the time, the highs in my life arent out weighing the lows. i shouldnt be this scared all the time but i am, my throat is ripped out and im begging for more. im to young to feel this old. but enough about me.

sleeping like theres no tomorrow.

...

I TRIED TO PICK OUT SOMETHING THAT YOU WOULD LIKE.
ITS HARD.
I GOT YOU PORCELAIN RINGS, YOUR WRISTS DIDNT FIT
YOU LEFT ME BEHIND

baby im drunk and its warm
not like you are listening but im naked in the backyard
picking flowers that look just like your face when you wake up
not that you care
im digging two graves one is a bed and the others a door
not that you are awake
you will wake up next to a shovel, it wont leave the marks that i do
"what doesnt kill you", well baby it will eventually
paint a picture of me in shining silver ink
this is a gateway drug
your coming home and im buying time
just grab the handle and fill the holes.

so its been a while.
maybe because i forgot my password,
maybe cause i had nothing to say
maybe because no one really noticed i stopped
but im back for a bit